How Was Your Day Thread V5

[Soleil]

I submitted an anonymous complaint against my now former-manager at that retail place. Nothing will come of it, because that's how the world works, but I think they should know how she treats people. It's no wonder the store is short-handed. She talks shit about every person who interviews and judges them based on appearances (and I don't mean sloppily dressed - she literally said one was too skinny, one was not pretty enough, etc). I'm so glad I quit.

[KarenGriff]

I'm so excited for autumn. I've been suffering all summer.

I'm waiting for it too! It's simple, I never liked summer and the really hot weather of it. xD I just love cold and snow.

[HiddenMystic]

If you would - give her a click? Thanks

https://woobox.com/tiufuc/gallery/RudLiCoYNbo

[prettypretties]

Anyone have advice on getting cats and dogs to get along? My dog is doing well with not chasing the cat -- she hardly even pays attention to it. But my cat keeps stalking around my dog, and seems really stressed. She will stalk around for a while and then slowly approach the dog and hiss/growl. I guess it's good they aren't outright fighting, but I'm wondering if I could be doing anything to make my cat more comfortable. Keep in mind this is only day two of them being back together under one roof since I was away a year. Before I left I hadn't had my cat long, so I had just kept them separated. I still keep them separated while I'm asleep bu putting my dog in the bathroom since I'm not there to supervise. But I'd really love to have them both have free reign of my apartment 24/7.

we're not experts but we've lived with cats (and the occasional dog) most of our life, and worked in cat rescues and such, so we'll do our best to offer some hopefully-helpful tips. remember we're fallible creatures and we don't know your cat or your situation, so feel free to take or leave anything we say based on whether it works for you. <3

long post is long:

Spoiler

while we don't know the specific cause of the problem for your cat here, it's likely a combination of things that may well ease over time and could probably be helped along that road with some general de-stressing or handy tricks.

this can sometimes help: if you take some shed fur from your cat's bed or a place she likes to sleep, and then with it on/in your hand you pet the dog and rub your kitty-fur hand all in the dog's fur, you'll make the dog smell more like a safe family member to the cat. it smells like the cat touched the dog while she was relaxed and everything was okay.

if you think the cat might be stressed about the dog's position in the family and/or whether she's a threat, you can try giving the cat a raised feeding station where she's off the ground and above dog-height when she eats and drinks. if your dog is good at ignoring food when you ask her to, you can also try feeding them within sight of each other, specifically feeding the cat first and making sure the dog doesn't interfere with her eating or make a fuss. either or both of these two things can reassure a cat that the dog isn't going to steal her food, and the second one in particular also tells your cat that you won't allow the dog to attack her in any circumstances.

having more raised areas in general for your cat to hang out on is a great way of lowering a cat's stress and improving their life overall, especially if their stress is caused by another animal in the home. you might already have this, but if not it's great if you can give her something like a bed on top of a wardrobe or somewhere else that's above human head height, because almost all cats feel safer in high places and above other creatures. and in your cat's case, since it's the dog she's stressed about, even just moving her bed high enough to be out of the dog's reach should help.

cats who live with humans also usually want to engage with the world and with you on a more even or sociable height level whenever they can anyway, so having places she's allowed to walk around on that are somewhere between your waist height and your shoulder height may well make her happier too. more of this sort of thing should help her feel more at ease around the home, again especially if it's out of the dog's reach. the more space she has to live and spend her time that's out of dog-range, the more likely she is to relax about the dog, stop caring so much, and start to feel safe with her around.

another thing that could be contributing is that cats and dogs often have trouble communicating, because they speak different dialects of bodylanguage. especially troublesome is that some of the things they say mean the opposite in each other's dialect. like a wagging tail for a dog means friendly and approachable, and for a cat means stressed and stay the heck away. your cat might be stressed because she's reading your dog's bodylanguage as if the dog is saying anxious or aggressive things all the time when she's actually just saying she's happy. it's tough to help someone get past that kind of language barrier when you have a bit of a language barrier with them yourself, but if you feel like that might be what's bothering your cat you can try translating for her if you want.

to translate try any of the following: whatever it is that you normally use to tell your cat things are okay or good (be it a sound or a phrase or a gesture or something else), you can try doing/saying that thing whenever you see the cat watching the dog and seeming stressed out. if you're able to make a noise that sounds like purring, you can try doing that when your cat seems anxious about the dog. you can also try yawning, closing your eyes, stretching out and relaxing, or making sleepy noises when you see your cat looking anxiously at your dog. any of these things can help communicate to your cat that there's nothing to be worried about, because you're relaxed. yawning in particular is more likely to be noticeable to your cat as meaningful communication, and can also communicate "try to calm down please" specifically as well as "it's okay", because cats and dogs both use yawns this way themselves.

if you have trouble with cat communication in general by the way, it can help to know that a cat's vocal language is tonal, meaning the pitch of your voice is the thing that carries meaning to them. so using a sing-song voice with your cat, and having phrases that you always say in the same tone of voice, with the same collection of 'notes' (essentially) in your voice, will help your cat recognise and understand those phrases. most people do this anyway without really thinking about it, but it can be cool to know the reason behind it too, and knowing how it works can make it easier to achieve more of what you want to do with it. ^_^ (of course, you might know already, since you live with a cat. we don't want to make assumptions.)

these can be expensive, but there are scents you can get in most western countries that emulate the scent of a cat's cheek glands, they usually come as diffusers for your home. (we know you might not be in a western country though.) if you can get them, these can help a cat relax and adjust to changes, especially a new environment or new family member, or other big change in the home. they basically just make the whole place smell more like "this is mine, i'm safe here" and help cats feel more at ease in general. [edit: search terms that can help you find these are phrases like "cat de-stress scent", "cat calming remedy" and "cat pheromone therapy diffuser". or one (expensive) brand that we know of is called 'feliway'. end edit.]

we want to acknowledge that you might already know any/all of these things and may potentially have already tried (or be unable to try) one or more them. but we don't know, you also might not (most of them aren't common knowledge in our experience), so we prefer to just offer all the things and not assume. ^_^

we might be able to think of more over time or if we know more about your cat's situation and behaviour, and we'd really like to, but honestly it's more likely we'll have to conserve our spoons for other things. so if you give more info and we don't respond, we apologise in advance. talking to people is a big deal for us so we often need to put that big-deal energy into our own problems instead. either way, we hope at least something in this is helpful to you, and if not, we hope you find something that helps elsewhere. <3

[QueenOfMolluscoids]

Today my literally worst nightmare came to live: police came to my home and asked to identify someone I was chatting with on security camera footage. And I have prosopagnosia/face blindness, so I literally had no idea which of my neighboors (?) that was.
That was one of the most awkward conversations in my life and it became even more awkward, when we realized that "me" on the footage was actually my sister, who isn't even my twin.

[Dancingstar]

i reached for the new eggs in the stream, of which there were about 4 or 5, but i got the messege that someone clicked it before i did. but when the page refreshed they were all gone.

ugh.

[NyxNoire]

i reached for the new eggs in the stream, of which there were about 4 or 5, but i got the messege that someone clicked it before i did. but when the page refreshed they were all gone.

ugh.

The stream refreshes every 15 min, at x.00, x.15, x.30, and x.45. Every single time that happens, the first row of eggs are normal everyday random eggs. But when there's a new release or an event, the new creatures are flooding.

That means that as soon as you click any of the first row of random eggs, one of the new flooding eggs will take its place and will continue to do so for the next 15 minutes.

If you don't want to keep the random egg you removed to get at the new ones, just freeze it and send it to Master Belmos or NurseryHelper.

[Ayakashi]

Non MS related Discord chat:

Two members complaining about instructors not understanding they don't have time to do assignments in the allotted time frame b/c work/other classes/etc, etc.

Me as an instructor wanting to mention that we get that excuse ALL THE TIME, and we do understand the idea of having a life outside of school. Point out that students never consider we have lives outside of school, and often want grades/feedback/help immediately, not considering we might have other things we need to do just as they do. (In other words, instructors are human too!)

While at the same time knowing if I do I will be told how completely insensitive I am, and how I don't understand having to work to pay bills etc, etc.

FYI: I am an instructor at a local college, I was a student as said college not to long ago, and worked through school. I have to work a second job just to make ends meet, so I know all about making sacrifices to be able to get an assignment in, and going to work.

[SirChicken]

Finally! I'm all caught up on my Flight Rising familiar spreadsheet! Hadn't added any new familiars since Riot of Rot '18, so it kept me busy for almost half the day.

[HobbitFeet]

Spoiler

I watched Rosemary's Baby last night for the first time and I'm still hella frustrated with it. It's got to be one of the most "product of its time" films I've ever seen.

The pregnant mother drank alcohol multiple times, and sat around smoking people. It gave me such anxiety. But the way her surrounding characters hushed her up and silenced her concerns and opinions made me so mad. Just the way they talked to her. OH! Also, the husband casually raped his unconscious wife and she just brushed it off as a mild annoyance. What in the hell?? Get this garbage outta my face...